One of my favorite sayings in A.A. is
“Life isn’t about avoiding the storm, but learning instead to dance in the rain”
There’s a storm in my life right now. The ending of a relationship that I thought was forever.
The storm is inside me. It is inside my heart.
It rages loud and strong. It rages quietly and painfully.
No matter how many years of sobriety I have…there will always be storms.
Some storms are little. A quick shower and it’s over. Others are dark violent storms that seem to last forever.
Every time a storm comes into my life, I have to relearn again how to dance in the rain.
Yesterday was full of torrential downpours.
So I tried to dance…
The storm will continue to rage.
I’ve learned to not avoid them.
My dance is still a little awkward…a little shaky…
But I’m dancing.
It was a last minute weekend trip. I needed to get away. My life seems to be filled with so much change and sadness these days…
I wanted to find a bit of solitude and serenity. A place that would replenish and heal the empty spaces inside of me.
I found a little cabin to stay at…
By a river…
Deep in the heart of the White Mountains in New Hampshire.
A place to lose…and find myself
Where the spring rivers run wild…
Making my heart pound.
Reminding me I am still very much alive.
Warm forest paths…
Filled with fragile new life.
Reminding me to be grateful for the little things.
There are some truly beautiful places on this earth.
Many that people might call heaven.
I found just such a place today.
With Orion at my side…we hiked up this trail…not really knowing what to expect.
I certainly did not expect this…
I had found heaven.
And as the sun set tonight
I was reminded of the words inscribed at Lonesome Lake…
Spring, it seems, has been struggling to reach our hill here in central Vermont.
But slowly…very slowly the earth is waking up. I’ve been waiting. Waiting and watching. Eager for all the colors to burst forth and the lush green to return.
I’ve tried not to be too impatient. Spring comes when it’s ready.
The unfolding of nature.
I am watching it with wondrous eyes. And I try to capture its essence with pictures and words.
There is something almost sensuous about this process of unfolding.
Rich, earthy, sultry.
It’s as if the trees and flowers
Are not only unfolding, but are getting ready to burst wide open in bloom
And as the natural world unfolds, so do I.
Opening my arms and heart…to welcome the arrival of spring.